Forum Transcripts

The Revision Process: One Step at a Time 5/10/05

Event start time:

Tue May 10 12:06:42 2005

Event end time:

Tue May 10 13:31:23 2005



Legend:
Questions from the Audience are presented in red.
Answers by the Speaker are in black.
The Moderator's comments are in blue.

mary rosenblum

Hello all!

mary rosenblum

Welcome to our Tuesday Forum!

mary rosenblum

This is the Tuesday Forum with me, Mary Rosenblum, LR Web Editor, fiction and nonfiction writer and today we're talking about the process of revision. If you're new here, remember that you need to click on the 'Ask a Question' button or the 'word bubble' next to the red question mark at the top of the screen, or use the ask a question icon in order to ask a question. Your regular 'send' bar won't reach me! You can also type /ask in front of your question to reach me.

mary rosenblum

Just an announcement before we get started...

mary rosenblum

Glimmer Train is having a contest...

mary rosenblum

the first prize is 2000 and publication, and second and third also get money, but only get a mention in the magazine.

mary rosenblum

You can find details on the website.

speckledorf

Just wanted to share...I received my diploma today. It looks so good!

mary rosenblum

Hey, GREAT, speck! Hang it on the wall. It represents a LOT of work!

mary rosenblum

I wanted to talk about revision today...

mary rosenblum

I've been working on the 'revision' section for the novel course...

mary rosenblum

and that, plus what I've seen from my students has really set me thinking about revision.

mary rosenblum

Most courses don't really teach new writers HOW to revise...you sort of learn by doing.

mary rosenblum

And I think the reason that so many new writers seem to HATE it, even fear it...while few pros dislike it...

mary rosenblum

is that it can seem so overwhelming if you just go at it.

mary rosenblum

Do, please, use your private message feature to chat during the forums. It gets hard to read for those people with slow servers, if there is a lot of chat

mary rosenblum

I'll wait until you all are done. :-)

mary rosenblum

Revision is about as important as your original story idea itself...

mary rosenblum

because rarely is your story its best at the end of draft one.

mary rosenblum

And you can't see that...because you know your story too well.

mary rosenblum

And this goes for nonfiction as well...

mary rosenblum

You are too familiar with what you MEANT to say, everything fits, everything works.

mary rosenblum

Later on, with some distance, so that you have forgotten exactly what you were thinking as you wrote that article or story...

mary rosenblum

you find amazine holes, gaps, loose ends, weak places where the character acts unexpectedly.

mary rosenblum

And they stand out, because our noses are no longer pressed to the page, so to speak.

mary rosenblum

Even a really good idea will not sell if the writing is poor.

mary rosenblum

And trying to do perfect prose in a first draft means you are trying to wear both author and editor hat at the same time.

mary rosenblum

I can't make both those areas of my brain work at the same time. I either have to be editor OR writer.

mary rosenblum

Of course, when you sit down to that stack of pages...it can be really daunting.

mary rosenblum

Where do you start, what do you do first?

mary rosenblum

Most people just wade in...and pretty soon they're once again so close to what they're doing that they have no perspective.

forest elf

oh, yeah...like my character pulling up the throw?

mary rosenblum

You mean pulling the throw up? LOL

mary rosenblum

Yep, like that elf.

mary rosenblum

I've found that breaking down your revision means it takes less time to make a 'pass' through the ms...

mary rosenblum

you can focus on what you are doing...and you really do use a different mental state for each 'level' of revision.

mary rosenblum

The time factor is REALLY big when that stack of pages is about 400 high!

mary rosenblum

Keep your 'creative' brain turned on for that first pass...

mary rosenblum

Here, you are reading for story.

mary rosenblum

Does the plot work, do events follow logically, do your subplots tie back into your main plot...

mary rosenblum

in a story, are the implied actions that happen off stage clear to the reader?

mary rosenblum

Does your MC's behavior make sense? ]

mary rosenblum

Don't worry about grammar, description, active voice...any of that stuff...

mary rosenblum

Just read it through and see if it works.

mary rosenblum

This is actually where I give my work to readers.

mary rosenblum

They get it after I've decided the story as a whole works and before I really delve into craft and character minutiae.

mary rosenblum

This is because at this stage, it is still 'wet clay' to me.

mary rosenblum

I can toss half of it out and change it if needed...no sweat.

mary rosenblum

Once I have committed to this story shape and started to do the finer revisions, I am more resistant to big changes.

gskearney

I have a question about character "voice." When or where should you really start worrying about realizing that in your writing?

mary rosenblum

I would work on that, and characterization in depth, in your second revision, gary.

mary rosenblum

Your story overall works.

mary rosenblum

Now it's time to increase the magnification if you will...and look more closely at the ms scene by scene.

mary rosenblum

This is the time to look at characters closely. Do they have consistent voices? Will readers infer their emotions from their body langauge, actions, thoughts sufficiently?

mary rosenblum

Does their dialogue work?

oddangel

What do you do if you think your story doesn't work?

mary rosenblum

Ha, I have one like that right now, odd!

mary rosenblum

Actually, the first thing to think about is whether or not your feeling that

mary rosenblum

this doesn't work is valid...or is it your own insecurities about YOU as a writer?

mary rosenblum

Most of us, when we start out, are pretty insecure about what we're doing and we haven't had publishing success and reader feedback ...

mary rosenblum

to assure us that yep, we're doing what we think we're doing.

mary rosenblum

I thought very few of my stories worked as a novice writer...even when I won awards for them, LOL!

mary rosenblum

BUT...if you really do feel your story doesn't work, and it's not your personal insecurities, there are a couple of things to do.

mary rosenblum

Give it to a couple of good readers and quizz them about it after...

mary rosenblum

did you get this? Did that work for you? Listen to their reactions. Enthusiastic? Lukewarm?

mary rosenblum

If it still doesn't seem to work, put it aside. Wait for an aha moment and move on to something else.

mary rosenblum

Of course, this can be a trap if you ALWAYS move on to something else...

mary rosenblum

which is why I said you have to learn what is YOU and waht is a real concern.

oddangel

So, give them the first draft?

mary rosenblum

Sure. I think it's a BIG mistake to give readers a polished version.

mary rosenblum

If it's polished why do you want a reader?

mary rosenblum

Give 'em a first draft and tell 'em it's a first draft and that you mean to change it.

mary rosenblum

A lot of folk will mumble nice nothings if they think a story is finished...

mary rosenblum

but tell 'em its a first draft and you need help..

mary rosenblum

and you get all kinds of suggestions. None may work for you, but they can often spark that 'aha' moment.

gail

Gasp! You give your work to readers at such a fledgling state?! How can you?! I hold back until I figure I've worked out all the kinks...but then, I feel much more resistant to change things, too. Hmmm... You may have a very good point here. :-)

mary rosenblum

Ha, I generally stick my poor long suffering readers with stuff that isnt' even spell checked and they have to live with it.

mary rosenblum

I never show polished drafts to anyone but the editor they are sent to.

mary rosenblum

Why should I?

mary rosenblum

I don't intend to change 'em at that point.

mary rosenblum

I have a new reader...a woman who is writing mystery, a former student of mine...and she was SHOCKED by the first draft I sent her...

mary rosenblum

I did warn her. LOL... It was FULL of plot holes, rough characterization, etc. I don't think she believed I could write any way but waht she read in the mags. She knows better now, heheh.

gail

So, are you saying editors won't ask for a story/article to be changed? Or, are you saying you only compromise when appropriate on your work?

mary rosenblum

oh, they'll ask for changes...I've got two revision requests from my editor at Tor that are signficant changes...

mary rosenblum

will require some rewriting rather than tweaking...

mary rosenblum

but they're good suggestions and if one of my readers had made 'em, I would have followed 'em then...

mary rosenblum

but they didn't.

mary rosenblum

But when I'm happy with my story, I'm only going to discuss changes with my editor...

mary rosenblum

he's paying for it, after all.

tkat_2

In one of the LR assignments I had a whole page was removed. It helped move the story better.

mary rosenblum

I'm not surprised, tkat. Nearly everybody needs to learn to leave stuff out as a novice writer.

mary rosenblum

I have many published stories from my early years that I could cut by about a fifth now.

gail

So, what sort of criteria do you base your acceptance of those more major revisions?

mary rosenblum

Whether it improves the story, gail. That's it.

mary rosenblum

If I don't think it improves the story, we argue. David had three requests when we started out...we compromised on two, and I agree with him on those.

mary rosenblum

This is the Tuesday Forum with me, Mary Rosenblum, LR Web Editor, fiction and nonfiction writer and today we're talking about the process of revision. If you're new here, remember that you need to click on the 'Ask a Question' button or the 'word bubble' next to the red question mark at the top of the screen, or use the ask a question icon in order to ask a question. Your regular 'send' bar won't reach me! You can also type /ask in front of your question to reach me.

marly

That's really helpful, Mary. I've been "polishing" a story to send to my critiquers, but now they're gonna get it a little sooner. :)

mary rosenblum

You know, one of the things I found early on, Marly, is that criticism of your work will always smart...

mary rosenblum

even when it's valid. And if you KNOW this story is rough..you have given yourself permission to hear criticism ...you KNOW it's rough.

mary rosenblum

If you give a reader something that is polished...at the back of your brain what you want is praise.

mary rosenblum

I give my work to readers when I'm not happy with it yet and I DO want help in the form of their input.

mary rosenblum

They always find something I've overlooked!

mary rosenblum

It's like the mystery I sent to Jane, my reader.

mary rosenblum

I knew it didn't quite work, and I hadn't figured out how to deal with the problem...

mary rosenblum

and she confirmed that yep, it didn't work and offered her suggestions. They didn't work, but as I reacted to them (no, that won't work) I came up with the way to make it work. :-)

gskearney

To get a little away from the point, criticism does hurt, people are picking on your children here! That's why it's important to be as polite as possible. It's not an ego contest. We're all trying to get better. --gk

mary rosenblum

Oh, absolutely. There is NO reason EVER to be harsh about saying what needs to be said.

mary rosenblum

The whole point of critiqueing is to tell someone how to make their piece better, not tell 'em what is wrong with it.

t green

so once you get your story (let's say a novel) the way you like it, then you go into the details... where do you start? at the beginning? or just pick a scene, any scene?

mary rosenblum

WE have sort of gotten off the track here, t, thanks... Yes...

mary rosenblum

I would always begin a revision pass from the start and work through to the end.

mary rosenblum

In a short story, it's not so critical, but in a novel, you are keeping a very large picture in your head as you revise...

mary rosenblum

and small changes early on will affect events later.

mary rosenblum

WE have our fist pass...the 'story' pass...

mary rosenblum

and on the second revision, you can focus on your characters, their actions in the scenes...

mary rosenblum

This is actually where I do most of my characterization. I know them in draft one, but I have to make sure the readers know them, too, in Two.

gskearney

Too bad there's not a temporary Alzheimer's pill, so you could read your story with naive eyes. --gk

mary rosenblum

Well, there are two ways to achieve that actually, gary. :-)

mary rosenblum

One is to put it away for a year. Takes time!

mary rosenblum

THe other is to write something else. At least for me, I have found that if I shelve a story, long or short, and write another...as soon as I am deeply...

mary rosenblum

involved in the new story, I forget the old one. Limited ram I guess! LOL

mary rosenblum

And then, when I've finished the first draft of the new story or synopsized the new novel...THEN I go back to the waiting draft. Voila. Clear eyes.

mary rosenblum

This is the Tuesday Forum with me, Mary Rosenblum, LR Web Editor, fiction and nonfiction writer and today we're talking about the process of revision. If you're new here, remember that you need to click on the 'Ask a Question' button or the 'word bubble' next to the red question mark at the top of the screen, or use the ask a question icon in order to ask a question. Your regular 'send' bar won't reach me! You can also type /ask in front of your question to reach me.

gail

As a novice, I fret over the small stuff. It really challenges me to let someone read a "raw" piece that hasn't been spell or grammar checked. When I do that editing, though, I also edit for plot consistency and characterization, et al. But, if I understand you correctly, these should all be done as separate editing processes?

mary rosenblum

It will make your life easier, gail, especially if you're very meticulous.

mary rosenblum

I save my third revision for the grammar nits.

mary rosenblum

This is where I check for passive voice, tighten sentences, find stronger and more vivid ways to say things...make description really shine.

mary rosenblum

In each revision, you are focusing more and more with your 'editor' brain and less and less with your 'creative' brain.

mary rosenblum

In the first revision you are focusing on story issues...

mary rosenblum

in the second, you are paying attention to characters and action...

mary rosenblum

and in the third you're down to words.

mary rosenblum

Now this is not the ONLY way to revise for pete's sake!

mary rosenblum

You'll find what works for you.

mary rosenblum

BUt if revision seems daunting, then try breaking it down to this format and see if it doesn't help you.

mary rosenblum

This is the Tuesday Forum with me, Mary Rosenblum, LR Web Editor, fiction and nonfiction writer and today we're talking about the process of revision. If you're new here, remember that you need to click on the 'Ask a Question' button or the 'word bubble' next to the red question mark at the top of the screen, or use the ask a question icon in order to ask a question. Your regular 'send' bar won't reach me! You can also type /ask in front of your question to reach me.

mary rosenblum

One of the problems with trying to accomplish EVERYTHING in one pass is that you are dealing with different levels of examination here...

mary rosenblum

if you're paying attention to characters and how they speak, interact, act...

mary rosenblum

you are probably not going to be focused on the individual words...

mary rosenblum

and if you stop to focus on the individual words, you lose the 'continuity' of the flow of action.

johnnycat15

Loaded question, how do you know when you're done revising?

mary rosenblum

That is always a tough call, and remember, if you are an unpublished writer...

mary rosenblum

that you can't be rejected if you haven't sent the ms off yet...so ask yourself...

mary rosenblum

if that piece REALLY isn't done yet or are you just scared to commit it to the mail?

mary rosenblum

And in reality, my rule of thumb is when you find yourself changing only words...

mary rosenblum

you tweak some dialogue here, you improve a bit of description there...

mary rosenblum

then you're done.

mary rosenblum

Remember...well, you don't realize this yet...

mary rosenblum

there IS no absolute standard of perfection and you WILL work with an editor.

mary rosenblum

That editor's idea of perfection isn't quite yours...

mary rosenblum

and your perfect, polished sentence may 'clunk' for him...

mary rosenblum

so if you're fixing tiny tweaky things...you're wasting your time.

mary rosenblum

DO one good 'tweaky' pass...those words, phrases, etc....and then you are DONE>

mary rosenblum

You really can tweak and polish forever. Trust me!

mary rosenblum

I have a published writer friend who has managed to avoid publishing for about eight years now with that technique. LOL

mary rosenblum

I think that may be the hardest concept for novice writers to understand..

mary rosenblum

that there is no absolute standard.

mary rosenblum

What you think is perfect, someone else will not...

mary rosenblum

so the main focus of your revision process is...

mary rosenblum

does this story work?

bengalrose

Ah, thanks, Mary. I tend to be a tweek-meister. I definitely fall into THAT trap. "It can't go out yet, I'm still tweaking it!!"

mary rosenblum

Yep. COMMON problem!

mary rosenblum

The process in nonfiction is a bit different, because your're not usually dealing with characterization unless you're writing personal narrative...

mary rosenblum

but even there...do a first revision for logic, order, did I make my points clearly and in logical order.

mary rosenblum

Do a revision where you pay attention to the style and 'voice' you're using for this particular magazine. Does it fit?

mary rosenblum

Then do a 'tweak' run to polish the words.

mary rosenblum

I always tell myself I need to leave something for my editor to do, LOL.

mary rosenblum

The one thing that you DO need to think about is that darn spell checker.

mary rosenblum

Spell checkers do NOT catch misspellings when they spell a real word!

mary rosenblum

So when you are tweaking, read for that.

gail

I notice how the editing process seems to reflect the writing process: Does the story work?/Just get the story down; Are the characters believable?/Fill in some characterization and setting details through dialogue and action; etc. Is this reflection of the writing process intentional?

mary rosenblum

Well, I"m not sure how you work, gail, but for me that IS the writing process...editing is PART of writing for me.

mary rosenblum

My first draft is only 'get the story down'.

mary rosenblum

My second draft, technically editing, is deepen the characterization, make the scenes work...

mary rosenblum

and my third draft is 'tweak and polish'.

mary rosenblum

And that's it for me. It goes out.

mary rosenblum

Working with an editor, I'

mary rosenblum

l'll be incorporating any story changes he/she wants, but it's my editor's job to do the tweak and polish...

mary rosenblum

and I can agree or disagree. And I usually agree...words are their business.

gail

Okay, so after thirty edits, I'm probably just tweaking, huh?

mary rosenblum

ohmygosh! I feel faint! LOL. Gail, I suspect you are probably polishing!

gskearney

It's probably time to re-recommend The 10% solution by Ken Rand here. It's a great take on self editing, and it's not expensive. --gk

mary rosenblum

Yes, good point, gary.

mary rosenblum

It has gone up to 6.99 as I recall...but it's a lovely 'how to' on tweaking.

mary rosenblum

And will help you recognize some of your own bad habits, prosewise.

mary rosenblum

You have to order it...but you can get it from www.fairwoodpress.com

mary rosenblum

This is the Tuesday Forum with me, Mary Rosenblum, LR Web Editor, fiction and nonfiction writer and today we're talking about the process of revision. If you're new here, remember that you need to click on the 'Ask a Question' button or the 'word bubble' next to the red question mark at the top of the screen, or use the ask a question icon in order to ask a question. Your regular 'send' bar won't reach me! You can also type /ask in front of your question to reach me.

oddangel

have you gotten better at guessing how long each stage takes

mary rosenblum

Oh yes, odd...

mary rosenblum

You'll learn your own writing habits and how you work...

mary rosenblum

depends on your life and how much writing time you can squeeze out of it.

avatar

Best any writer will ever invest!

mary rosenblum

I agree.

mary rosenblum

You'll learn a lot by applying it to your prose...

mary rosenblum

and it can make a huge difference, since most novice writers are WAY too wordy.

tory

Point well taken about three passes, Mary. However, I've found , as a student, I need to give a few more than three. I think I'd made three passess BEFORE I learned about action tags, that sort of thing. After only three my work would have screamed for the slush pile on its own1

mary rosenblum

WEll, you're kind of mixing up revision with learning, tory.

mary rosenblum

As you learn more powerful techniques, you end up revising yet again.

mary rosenblum

This is what happens to people who start learning to write by working on a novel...

mary rosenblum

by the end of the novel, they are usually SO much better that they end up doing a LOT of revision on the early chapters.

mary rosenblum

The faster you learn techniques, the more you'll revise work. I went through this stage!

mary rosenblum

One way to look at revision is that it is not 'housekeeping'...

mary rosenblum

but rather part of the writing process.

mary rosenblum

Most people really aren't done with what they are writing until they have revised a couple of times at least...

mary rosenblum

so it's not a chore like sweeping the sidewalk, but rather part of building the house.

mary rosenblum

And to be honest, I LOVE that second draft.

mary rosenblum

I HATE first drafts, I'd pay someone to write 'em for me.

mary rosenblum

But I love draft two.

mary rosenblum

Draft three is easy, just buffing and touching up.

mary rosenblum

When we first start out, we're so impatient to get our work out to editors (that's BEFORE we start amassing all those rejection slips, lol)...

mary rosenblum

and revision seems like a time consuming roadblock.

mary rosenblum

You learn that your story really isn't so perfect at the end of draft one as you think. :-)

mary rosenblum

Of course, we have the other end of the spectrum, ahem, Gail...where you never STOP revising. :-)

mary rosenblum

One thing to keep in mind is that different types of revsion require different 'distances' from that prose, be it fiction or non...

mary rosenblum

If you are looking at structure...or story...you are standing back and looking at the whole landscape.

mary rosenblum

If you are dealing with characterization or style for nonfiction...you're much 'closer' to the words, but still paying attention to the whole...

mary rosenblum

and when you get to tweaking single words, you are no longer seeing the whole...

mary rosenblum

just the sentences and paragraphs in front of your nose..

mary rosenblum

and this is why trying to combine all types of revision into one pass tends to get you into trouble.

mary rosenblum

You lose 'focus'...you're either too close or two distanced.

mary rosenblum

And DO realize that while you want your ms to look professional and be as 'clean' as possible...

mary rosenblum

you will NOT be rejected for a few typos or misspelled words!

mary rosenblum

Nor for messing up a bit on proper format.

mary rosenblum

And remember that perfection does not exist...

mary rosenblum

and your editor will change things to suit his or her idea of how this should read...

mary rosenblum

so don't polish endlessly.

mary rosenblum

It is also true that every writer will find a way to revise that works for him/her...

mary rosenblum

and it may be different from the process I described here...but if you're feeling flummoxed by the process...this is a place to start.

mary rosenblum

My writer friend Sage writes one draft. One.

mary rosenblum

And she polishes every word and paragraph as she goes...

mary rosenblum

and it takes her about 2 years to write a novel draft, but when she finishes that first draft she is done.

avatar

How much editer interaction is there for short stories?

mary rosenblum

Usually not much, avatar.

mary rosenblum

An editor might tweak sentences, do a bit of cut and tighten, but rarely will you get asked for much in the way of content changes...

mary rosenblum

Since Analog is probably your market, Stan asked me to add about two sentences of clarification to the novelette I sold him.

mary rosenblum

That's about typical.

mary rosenblum

Generally, in short fiction, if the editor wants a change in the story..

mary rosenblum

that editor won't accept the story, but will return it with a letter telling you what problem he/she found in the story.

mary rosenblum

If you revise the story and fix that problem, you can submit again, and the editor might buy it.

mary rosenblum

What they do is to polish your prose...usually not much for my stories... and you can argue or not when you see the galley proofs.

mary rosenblum

In novel...

mary rosenblum

you will usually get a 'revision' letter from the editor...

mary rosenblum

with specific page citations and requests for content changes...

mary rosenblum

and you'll return an entire new draft.

mary rosenblum

The editor will then do line edit changes on your prose, and you'll get the edited draft to copy edit...

mary rosenblum

at the same time the pro copy editor works on it.

mary rosenblum

That draft will incorporate your changes and the editor's line edits, and you can contest those line edits if you need to, but they're usually pretty mechanical...

mary rosenblum

Not every house will work this way. Some small presses don't give the author a copy of the edited page proofs...

mary rosenblum

a friend of mine was horrfied by the first printing of his mystery. I think we found something ten typos on page one!

mary rosenblum

If you're publishing with a small press house, you might want to make sure you get to look at the pages before they go to press!

mary rosenblum

He copy edited the book before the second printing, by the way.

mary rosenblum

But as you face revision, do realize that it is part of the writing process, and treat it with that level of respect. :-)

mary rosenblum

Well, this has been a fun 'Oregon hour." :-)

mary rosenblum

I hope this helps you...believe me, I can tell whether or not a student has revised. LOL

smilingsunflower

Mary, tips for successful school visits?

mary rosenblum

What kind of school visit, smiling?

smilingsunflower

high school writing

mary rosenblum

Oh, cool. I love those!

smilingsunflower

what shouldn't you do? what doesn't work?

mary rosenblum

I sort of play 'em by ear...sometimes the class is more interested in asking 'how to become a writer' questions...

mary rosenblum

and sometimes we do a hands on 'develop a story' session...

mary rosenblum

using input from the class...

mary rosenblum

The thing I've seen NOT work, when I've done class visits iwth other writers...

mary rosenblum

is when someone stands in front of the class and lectures.

mary rosenblum

I always try to get the kids involved. Lots of times I bring props...galley proofs, contracts, edited ms...that sort of thing.

mary rosenblum

Ask what they like and why they like it...

mary rosenblum

use it to talk about what makes good fiction or good writing...

mary rosenblum

stuff like that. :-)

mary rosenblum

Most of them are at least reading Stephen King LOL.

mary rosenblum

Well have a good day.

mary rosenblum

I think I'll drop into our casual chat early tomorrow, see if anyone is here...

mary rosenblum

I have a doctor's appointment at ten my time, so I'll probably come by an hour earlier.

mary rosenblum

So if any of you are earlibirds, I'll see you then!

mary rosenblum

Have a good day and I'll post this in the usual spot...Writing Craft, Forum Transcripts.

mary rosenblum

Bye, all!

 

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